The 14 emails I hate most

 

The other day during on of our more scintillating conversations (where more means less) my very close friend Kerri Sackville and I were discussing the relative sizes of our inboxes (where inboxes means the boxes where our email arrive – sorry to disappoint).

Kerri won that conversation because her box was bigger than mine (where box still means email depository) but I got a highly commended because of the contents of my email.  (By the way Kerri was, until the point that she read this post, completely unaware we were having a competition – she probably doesn’t even realise we are competing for best text messages either yet).

My inbox in not huge because I am fastidious and anal and keep it small and manageable and very good looking.  Also because I mostly communicate via Twitter, Facebook and Skype

But in order to keep this tiny, neat little box I have had to institute a hierarchy of emails so that I know how to deal with them as the come in.  They are (in very strict order)

  1. Your parcel has been dispatched
  2. Anything friendly or personal
  3. The meeting has been cancelled
  4. Thank you for submitting that piece we adore it
  5. In other words, these drugs are limited to adding or modifying natural body substances with the hope of effective purchasing viagra australia physical responses. Some men still viagra großbritannien think that online drugs can’t work as good as their branded counterparts can. Currently, available statistics vary between 10 – 20% as a marker for those who have a genetic component for their susceptibility to develop Gout. cialis generic cheapest Those coping with impotence, can buy Caverta online to rid plaque development in arteries, generic levitra after its consumption.

  6. You have been paid
  7. Your order has been processed
  8. Something to do with the building process we are about to embark on. I never understand them but I am quite happy to receive them I believe somewhat erroneously that  it takes me that much closer to the process being over
  9. School emails – usually about a billion a week alerting me to anything from lice to menu changes at the canteen
  10. Group activity email – usually sent by one of my son’s friends parents who want to attend an event en masse. I wanted to put this at number 11 but in the interest of my son having a good social life I didn’t
  11. Everything I have ever subscribed to – still not sure why I do that
  12. Nigerians and Russians proposing to me
  13. Nigerians offering me money
  14. PR companies being paid to promote a product asking me to promote it on my blog or on Facebook/Twitter for free.
  15. Please pay this bill

I actually delete most of them but I file everything related to number 7 because my husband is more fastidious than I am and he might one day ask me what the builder said about the structural beam on the 6 June 2014.   I will find that filed in it’s own special folder titled “stuff I hate  – renovations”.

 

Comments

  1. I currently have 4676 unread emails in my inbox. You wouldn’t consider that small and manageable I’m guessing?

  2. I am very impressed with your neat hierarchical inbox filing system, Lana. My own spam inbox is far too brutal and efficient for words – it ‘spams’ publications I’ve even paid for! Ludicrous!

    But in a way, I’m glad it’s extra vigilant as once a Year 11 student sent me a spam ‘essay’ which I innocently opened and it infected my whole computer (was harrowing).

  3. I have 267 unread after I decided to give up on all things internet. Yesterday. Arrrrrrr! Why do we do it to ourselves?!

    • If you continue to give up on all things internet you wont have to worry about the 267 unread emails but then you wouldn’t be here on my blog so that’s not okay. Best you start doing some brutal deleting xx

  4. Please come over and delete my emails. I have lost control of my box.

  5. I have a little over 21,000 in my inbox. I think I win?

  6. I have three read emails and no unread emails in my inbox. I AM WINNING AT EMAIL!

Leave a comment

*