“I know mum, I know. You remind me every day” my son muttered as I exclaimed how lucky we were. I thought I was muttering under my breath, as I am want to do, but turns out I was expressing myself out loud.
The words escaped my mouth out loud because my brain couldn’t contain anymore. We were eating breakfast and the news was on. We had just heard the horrific story that more than 70 people had been found dead in the back of a truck. 70 people. The news reported them as asylum seekers. I translated that internally to people, because seeking asylum was only part of their journey.
It happened in Austria. It brings to mind the hideous conditions that asylum seekers suffer every day. Especially here at home.
I know I constantly nag my son to appreciate his privilege. I know that it’s hard at 14 to have to understand that there is so much evil in the world that people would endanger their lives just to escape the tyranny and, that worse, when you escape the cruelty and oppression, there is more vile behaviour that awaits in people who would leave you for dead and governments who would deny you asylum.
I try and teach him to respect authority and listen to the wisdom of people who have lived long enough to gain perspective and understanding. I want him to be law abiding and courteous while still questioning and challenging things which oppose his values and beliefs. But these are hard lessons to teach when even I struggle to understand and respect the laws of our country.
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It’s not that he truly dismisses what I am saying or that he doesn’t understand me. He’s only 14 but he well and truly gets it. He knows seeking asylum is not illegal, he knows having a safe place to live should be a right not a privilege. He knows no person deserves to suffer because of their place of birth or the colour of the skin or the god they do or don’t believe in.
As a young Australian he knows the number of people seeking asylum in our country is far from unmanageable, he knows it costs more to terrorise adults and children in detention than to welcome them into our society and allow them to add to and aid our economy.
He knows that his family will never ever condone persecution based on place of birth, colour of skin or choice of religion.
What he doesn’t know is why so many people don’t take this as a given.
“What he doesn’t know is why so many people don’t take this as a given.” Thats something he will find out, sadly, as he grows up and starts to have conversations around this subject. What you have given him is a great base to start from. Information, education, compassion and respect. From there he will be able to talk to others and hopefully help create change in those that aren’t knowledgeable as he his. People that got their information from shock jocks and ignorant catch calls like ‘illegals’.
You are not alone. I did the same to my kids. Back in 2002 we went on a family holiday to the USA. In the museum of American history in Washington I saw the lunch counter where the civil rights movement began. That was an incredible thing to see and from that moment on my children got chapter and verse on racism, civil rights, tolerance. We stood in front of the reflecting pool and I told them about Martin Luther King and ‘I have a Dream’. We went South and visited plantations, more lecturing from me. I could see their eyes rolling every time I opened my mouth. But it sunk in. Fast forward to present day and my son is accompanying me to ‘you are welcome’ walks and my daughter sends horrified emails from here home in Europe about the situation in Nauru and how she is determined to use her vote effectively to help stop this situation.
So keep going Lana. He might roll his eyes and mutter at you now, but it will be worth it for the adult he becomes. Well done.
Your children sound wonderful – thanks no doubt to your eye-rolling inducing speeches xx
I think it’s great you remind him. I try to do the same with mine. But I don’t know if we can, really, understand. It is so horrific, I think we could end up being overwhelmed and do nothing to help). But what we can do is keep making efforts to support these in need, to lobby for improvements, to give to organisations who are set up to assist, and to see if there are things we are doing day to day that exacerbate the situation. I’d like to think I will increasingly use my energy in these ways (and I have to keep biting my tongue not to get worked up about things that don’t matter as much – such as whether someone spends $50,000 to ensure her baby is a particular gender. But that is, sadly, often easier to focus on. Imagine how $50,000 could help others though …)
The risk of overwhelm is huge. I know what you mean. *goes to write another letter to my MP*
Lana could you please be PM?
I know how lucky I am. 30 yrs ago this month I came to this country that we now call home as refugees from a war torn country in Central America. We have been given so many opportunities that many people can only dream of. I remind my kids of this all the time. They don’t understand because they were born here. Next year we plan on taking them back and showing them where it is that I was born just so they can understand how lucky they are to have the things that have.