Magic Kingdom is actually quite, er magic

Apparently Walt Disney once said about Disney World – “I don’t want the public to see the world they live in while they’re in the Park. I want them to feel they’re in another world”.  It worked. There is no sign of reality at Magic Kingdom, there are  a lot of other things

• Rides built with the express purpose of scaring people. No regard to entertainment, fantasy or spectacle. Just fear. These were my son’s favourite rides.

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• Mickey Mouse x 1000. Mickey Mouse everything. Seriously. Ice creams, pens, watches, bottle tops, bottles, tops, clothes, hats, toys, jewelry, glasses, bags, salt and pepper cellars, bushes, cutlery, dishes, soap, bins, towels, kitchen utensils, purses, make up, thumb tacks, ice cube trays, pasta   You getting my drift?

• NO litter. It is amazingly clean. Even if some bits are old and tired you won’t find a spot of litter. The upkeep is amazing. This means that you may very well be swept. There are a lot of people sweeping All The Time.

• Hundreds of little girls dressed in princess costumes with the most uncomfortable looking shoes you can imagine. It looks kind of like a scene from Toddlers and Tiaras (see I told you it could be scary)

• Stroller parking. Miles of it. I’m not quite sure why you’d bring really little kids here. The ones that aren’t sleeping are crying. That said there are some very big kids in strollers – there seems to be no age limit on strollers here. Peculiar

• Spectacular props and buildings. Real. Proper. Outstanding fantasy

• Parades of the happiest looking characters in the world. The first thing you notice is their costumes, then their smiles and then their film of sweat

• Lots of people on motorised transport. Some of them because they are lazy, some because they need it and some because they are just too large to walk. Seriously. Sad.  Most of these people get up off their scooters to jump (yes jump) onto rides.

• Many families dressed in the same outfit. Either they are posing for the next edition of Funniest Family Photos or they are trying to start a trend. What other reason could you have to dress your children, your spouse and yourself in identical outfits? If you can’t find someone is it easier to remember that you had the same shirt on than to remember say, what your child looks like?

• A boy with a serious adrenalin addiction and a huge smile. He may be my son.

• A man desperately trying to keep up with his son’s total lack of fear and desire to ride anything that moves. He may be my husband

• A woman frenetically writing blog posts on her phone while her husband and son ride every insane post. That may be me

• A man and child laughing hysterically at a woman who ensured them the “It’s a Small World ride” would be awesome. That may be my family. Note to self: do not suggest rides built in the 70’s that are tame and set to music to two boys that like rides that involve plunging off mountains

• Wonder and amazement in the faces of all the guests who weren’t at that minute displaying weariness and frustration.

• Some of the most wondrous and amazing rides I have ever seen. The attention to detail and the reality of the rides is spectacular.

I had am awesome day but if I ever hear “It’s A Small World” again I will stick needles in the eyes of the singer.