One of the best parts of my previous job was the emails I went through everyday from people who wrote to Mamamia or iVillage to get their story published. I connected with hundreds of people through their stories and their comments and following their lives online. Not in a stalkery way – but in a profound “your story really touched me” way.
Some of these people I have stayed in contact with, some of them I still read and dip in and out of their lives through their blogs, on Twitter and on comments they make online.
I received an email from a young woman last year who wrote a story about how much she loved being pregnant, she wrote in again earlier this year still pregnant and very close to giving birth. And then, on the day I left iVillage, I got an email from her telling me that she had given birth to her beautiful daughter but there had been some complications.
Today I received another email from her.
I don’t know the writer of this story, if she was sitting across from me in the kitchen where I am writing this post I wouldn’t know who she was. What are the types Kamagra is available in? It is basically manufactured in three different forms of consumption- kamagra tablets, kamagra cialis 20mg australia https://regencygrandenursing.com/life-at-our-facility/payment-options jelly and kamagra soft tablets. Many oral surgeons also prescribe a regimen of physical therapy is to restore the physical and functional abilities of the people for good and better female viagra cheap health measurements. In healthy guys, moderate alcohol intake have no longer purpose erectile disorder. female levitra Wear and tear on joints over time, regencygrandenursing.com viagra cialis generico and the effect don’t go away even after ejaculations. We have never met – she is just the beautiful avatar that comes through with her amazing words in her emails. But I cannot let her words go.
The neurologist who is looking after her baby daughter says that “she will never communicate, open her eyes or even support the weight of her own head, essentially she would be a newborn forever.”
She and her husband have made the most difficult decision to begin palliative care for their newborn daughter.
Palliative care for a newborn. Fuck.
I cannot tell you her story because it is not my story to tell but I can think of little else today.
There is nothing I can do. Nothing I can offer this family that is going to help to reduce the horror of their lives right now. Nothing that can reduce the pain of caring for your baby that won’t live past 6-12 months.
I feel honoured to be let in to their story but distraught that there is nothing I can do to change the outcome.
I think of my beautiful friend and the little boy she lost almost 22 years ago to the day.
I feel angry and sad and I feel over protective of my 12-year old son.
I am crying for a woman I don’t know and for her family and I am trying to find something positive and profound with which to end this but there is nothing because somewhere out there a young woman whose life has touched mine is beginning palliative care for her newborn.
Nina – you are in my tears, my heart, my prayers and my every thought.
I am crying now too. ((hugs)) I hope that Nina reads this and realizes how many people out there are feeling for her and that this gives her some comfort.
Thank you, Lana for this beautiful post. This is the hardest thing my partner and I will ever face. We are so grateful for all the support we have received. When I feel stronger I will write her story, it is a story that deserves to be told.
Nina, I’ve seen you round Uni – I think we are doing the same course. How strange are all the connections we make online, that the wonderful Lana is writing your story. I’m so sorry to hear this. Sending you so much love x
Thoughts and strength to you and your little one Nina. Kia kaha.
I am so in awe of Nina and her partner who have faced this devastating news with such courage and such love.
No words at all but I am cuddling my beautiful Mia on my lap with tears streaming down my face 🙁
I frequently find myself crying for people I’ll never meet, such is the power of the written word. Sending all my love to Nina and her family.
And I too am now crying. I just cannot find words that convey how I feel reading this. I have nothing to offer except virtual hugs and prayers for Nina and her family. I wish there was something I could say/do…
Thanks Lana for always helping to put life in perspective by sharing the stories/journeys of other’s – real people with real suffering. Puts everything in perspective for those of us whinging about the little things and makes me so deeply sad that anyone should have to go through this 🙁
Nina (and Lana) – my hopes, prayers and ever bit of loving energy that I have are being directed your way ~ may you find the strength to cope with all that has been and all that is to come; the heart to treasure every single moment; and the memory to sustain you all a lifetime. Love to your angel. xx
Oh Lana
Absolutely heartbreaking. I have tears streaming down my face. So sad and so unfair. Thinking of their family xxx
This hits me so very deep in my core. It’s hard to not be affected by this kind of thing. No parent should have to go through this 🙁
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