It’s safe to say that I am not that good at dealing with authority. I don’t like people telling me what to do, think or believe.
Gosh I must have been a joy to educate. But, luckily for my teachers, and sadly for anyone that tries to converse with me now, I think that I have got worse as I have gotten older.
So why I would pay someone to tell me what to eat defies me. But that is just what I did , yesterday I went to see a dietician, not to lose weight (although that would be a MAJORLY welcome side-effect) but to help me with my bowel which is almost as irritable as my personality.
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Basically the dietician is meant to oversee my eating while I remove all FODMAPs from my diet. FODMAPS are are short chain carbohydrates, disaccharides, monosaccharides and related alcohols that are not well absorbed in the small intestine. (I’ve written about trying to give them up myself here). After they have all been eliminated you slowly bring them back into your diet (under the watchful eye of the dietitian) and then you see which ones are causing you grief.
I went to her, as one would go see a dietician, hoping that she would say “keep eating exactly as you are and just by having come into this office and paying me a lot of money you will be thin tomorrow by 3pm, also you will no longer ever experience stomach pain, bloating or any of the many side effects of irritable bowel syndrome.”
Kamagra pill and oral Jelly tastes different uk generic cialis and hides the bitter taste of its active ingredient. This is something that levitra pharmacy can prove extremely beneficial when there is lack of support from the likes of Mark Johnston, Sir Michael Stoute, Mick Channon, Brian Meehan and Ed Dunlop. The sachets of Kamagra Jelly should be cost of prescription viagra same like branded drug. Many of the reliable drug stores in the UK offer all versions of the kamagra to the insomniacs at the cheapest prices. sildenafil pill Except she didn’t say anything like that at all. What she did do was read from a VERY long list of things that I should not be eating for the next four weeks. She then told me that I must completely change my taste buds (I can’t), my perception of skim milk (I wont), the way I eat (I don’t really want to) and well, everything else.
I know that I made this appointment, I know that I paid her for her professional wisdom but I just can’t tell you how much I hated her telling me what to do. I tried not to argue with her when she told me to eat chemicals, I mean margarine instead of butter. I tried to keep a straight face when she suggested supplements, I tried not to balk when she suggested I drink so much water that my kidneys would surely drown, but inside I was a seething mass of but’s and if’s and no’s and Shut Up’s
My resistance was also due, in part to the fact that she was about ten years old. Okay maybe twenty but not much more. A young pretty woman telling me what to eat? I was old enough to be her mother. I’ll tell HER what to eat.
But on reflection, and after talking through it with a friend last night, I don’t think a dietician is what I need, I think what I need starts with a thera and ends with a pist. Just as long as they are over 40 and don’t tell me not to eat white foods.
Turns out that while there may be hope for people with irritable bowel syndrome, there is no diet for irritable personality.
I don’t know… seems weird to me to be suggesting you eat all this processed stuff (margarine, supplements) instead of maybe eating more unprocessed food… but what would I know, I’m not a dietician…
And that stuff about drinking water is a myth – there’s no scientific evidence that any of us needs to drink a minimum amount of water each day… just drink when you’re thirsty…
PLUS there is plenty of water in chocolate isn’t there? A glass and a half? Water/milk it’s all the same!
Of course! 🙂
I completely wrote off my psychiatrist when his suggestion for ‘getting over’ my depression was to make sure that I regularly went to the hair dresser because my grey hair is what is making me depressed (I’m 25 and yes I am pissed that I have to dye my hair to get rid of my salt and pepper but that’s not the point). When I said I couldn’t afford it because a trip to the hairdressers costs about $250 he just shrugged and said so that’s not much. I nearly put my hand out and told him that if it was no big deal to him then I would gladly take that $250 off his hands.
“Professionals” who have no grounding in real life really shit me, so I can understand your frustrations.
Thanks Tegan. Worrying when a doctor thinks that getting your hair done will alleviate your depression. Glad you moved on xx
God, I hate being told what to do too! I think it’s actually a genetic thing as my youngest daughter seems to have it too. As soon as someone tells me to do something I automatically want to do the opposite. I’m feeling your pain….
Well then I am in good company xxx
Hilarious post Lana although a irritable bowel and personality are no laughing matters! I remember once being asked to do a gluten test as my doc thought i might have coeliac disease. When I realised that might mean giving up my favourite pleasures in life (bread and pasta) I declined the test as living with some tummy pain is preferable to a life without bread!!
I hear you sister! If they come back telling me no more bread I swear I will close my ears and sulk!
i’m on FODMAPS. Well a version of it. You feel like your throat is cut at first, but when you can eat and not feel AWFUL and you can figure out what your problem foods are it is so worth it.
For me, gluten is a no go. I can eat most dairy except ice cream and milk and cream. So cheese is fine, sour cream and cream cheese are ok (don’t eat an entire world of cheese, but some is fine). Fructose is a bit hit and miss. I have garlic and onion because no one can take those away from me!!!
I already know that I am lactose intolerant but I am prepared to suffer for ice cream, not so much for cheese 😉
Garlic and onion are one of life’s necessities. I cannot imagine living without them long term!
I am glad to hear that it made a difference for you – I think I have been complaining for long enough that it’s time to get it sorted
xx
There’s very little lactose in cheese so it shouldn’t involve any suffer
Poor you. The mere word…acronym – FODMAPS make me feel queasy. And that young, pretty expert sounds insufferable. I wouldn’t take much notice of a twelve year old dietician, no doubt fresh out of uni and all theoretical.As well-intentioned as she is, what life experience could she possibly have?!
And look at the French, Lana – they don’t seem to have many problems (apart from smoking like chimneys). they’re stylish, love their dogs and frequent cafes, looking great despite daily feasting on croissants, cream and butter! Honestly, imagine telling someone to eat margarine (which is black before dyeing) rather than golden butter, which comes out of a cow and is therefore natural!
YOU could be my dietitian. I like the way you think xx
I do not feel safe to comment #diet.
You are wise. #word
I think we are very alike in this way. I once had a driving instructor tell me to indicate at a bend in the road (not a turn-off). I refused, we argued, and I never booked his services again. There isn’t much I hate as much as being told what to do, especially when it’s wrong. Like eating margarine instead of butter!
When I think of my poor driving instructor I feel quite bad. I think I may have been a little er, bossy with him. But I made it up to him by almost suffocating him with a hug when I got my licence. Or maybe that was not making it up to him at all…..
Ha ha I too just loathe being told what to do. Just ask my husband 😉
My husband would have been nodding so hard reading this post that he probably has a headache. Except he is worse than me! xx
My kids are on this & so am I. I found doing my research on the internet after I saw the dietician much more valuable.
We all eat lactose free milk cream etc, but butter, hard cheese & soft cheese with a rind are all fine because there is not much lactose in them.
The kids are really strict no fodmaps at all wver (5 year) but I can eat wheat and fruit so long a s I avoid chickpeas lentils etc. it does make cokking dinner when the other kid is a vegetarian.
I also hate being told what to do. This morning I told my husband to go away when he was watching me do a job just because I felt him building up to giving me a suggestion about it!
Perhaps disliking bossy people is a symptom of ibs?
Oh Lord – my husband watched me do stuff all the time and I HATE it. I can almost hear his thoughts telling me what to do.
Wow – must be hard to keep your kids off all FODMAPs. – Is that a temporary thing? The way I understood it was that if I gave my stomach time to recover I would be able to go back to most of them and only the ones that proved a problem in the challenge would I have to eat in smaller portions (although I would not have to give them up permanently)
Have you found any improvement in your symptoms since you started?
xxx
I studied Nutrition at Uni (as a mature student) with the intention of becoming a Dietitian, the majority of the class were young thin girls who looked like they needed a good feed. I couldn’t get past the calorie counting and the low fat dogma. I like real food and like you can’t abide skim or low-fat anything. I did complete my degree but don’t work as a Dietitian. I loved the science involved but the theory about why people overeat etc (in my opinion) has as much to do with psychology as diet.
This is why I need a therapist – and also someone like you as a dietitian. I wish you had gone into practice. It is so important to understand the personality and the complexities of WHY people eat. Everybody knows the “right” things to eat – it’s the “why” we eat the way we do that is the real problem.
Let me know if you ever start practising – I promise I will try and listen to you 🙂
Oh gosh I can relate to this. There’s a horrible powerlessness in having to pay someone to help you do something you could more or less do on your own, except that you haven’t managed it so far. I HATE feeling patronised and I tend to get my back up before I even go into meetings like these. I’ve been seeing the ‘food coach’ at my gym – similar deal – but I, too, was hoping for the ‘Just keep doing what you’re doing’ line. Sadly, I think it was even worse – she said ‘what you’re doing would be fine for someone else, but for your body, you have to work much harder.’ Sigh. I’m working very hard though on taking a deep breath each time I walk in and remembering that I ASKED for this information!
I hear you sister! Good on you for going back xxxx
I hate people telling me what to do, it’s why I was such a failure at Weight Watchers. I kept thinking “You’re not the boss of me!!” It’s also why I found it hard to give up cigarettes, because everyone was telling me to. In the end I decided that cigarettes weren’t the boss of me, and that made life easier. I hate dietitians, it’s like they all belong to the cult of yogurt.
Good luck with the IBS.
xx
Oh I love your comment. While I was sitting in that appointment I was singing that song from Malcolm In the Middle in my head “You’re not the boss of me, you’re not the boss of me, You’re not the boss of me and you’re not so big”
I don’t like many people from the cult of yoghurt xxx
I hope your personality gets less irritable when your bowl calms down… tummy ache of any kind is enough to make anyone a cranky bitch. Trust me, my family knows this all to well LOL!
Lol! My family also hope my personality gets less irritable xx
Ahh – reading this adds to my hatred of the field of dietetics!
First – I am a registered dietitian. Some where back in the day I choose this over pharmacy because it was one less year of schooling (I kick myself now for that!)
I understand why you went to her. You were doing an elimination diet to determine what triggered your IBS. What she gave you was a way to decrease your fat intake. I had to laugh about the margarine thing. In college (many years ago now mind you) they were going on and on about how much better margarine was than butter because it doesn’t have saturated fat. Instead they take an unsaturated fat and break a bond and change that from the cis position to the trans position – thus it is the same texture as butter but way “healthier” for you. Then they said that the trans position is not found naturally in nature. Even at that point my mind screamed, “What the heck is wrong with you – that would make it worse than butter!” Plus the assumption that whole milk is what is making us all fat. Hmmm – if whole milk made everyone fat than wouldn’t everyone from 1950 have been fat?
Any way – I am complaining about the field that puts food on my table. So sorry for your experience. If you are ever looking for a dietitian to give you advice on anything again call around and find one that has personal experience dealing with what ever it is you want advice on! Those are the ones that will give you the real advice that will be helpful!
Angel