The fundamental problem with getting children to appreciate their parents is that by the time kids fully understand everything their mother and father have done for them they are parents themselves. And by that time they are often too busy/exhausted/forgetful to do anything about it.
When we are children we take the loving care of our parents for granted, when we are teens we’re so self involved we just can’t see past ourselves (it’s a developmental thing not just a horrible teenage trait) and when we move out of home the feeling of freedom is so enormous, looking back in a meaningful way to assess all you’ve been given often isn’t even possible.
And so it is that sometimes kids leave home and kind of forget about all that “being brought up” stuff, they don’t think about the sacrifices we have made for them or the fact that our lives centred around them for the past eighteen years, and for that we are happy and proud. After all it’s said that that’s what being a good parent is about – bringing up children so they have the independence and resources to leave home and lead fulfilling lives. It’s all about letting go, they say.
But what happens when you are older, more needy and kind of wouldn’t mind a bit of that nurturing you gave out as a parent back in return?
They seem to have it sussed in China where there is a huge ageing population. According to official data there are 4.36 million people over the age of 60 which is equal to 30 percent of the city’s population. This means a lot of parents at home alone and missing the company of their kids.
Luo Peixin, deputy director of Shanghai’s city government’s law office spoke at a news conference last week saying that under new rules residents of Shanghai who fail to visit their elderly parents will get black marks on their credit records. The regulations state that adult children living apart from their parents should “visit or send greetings often.” And here’s the cracker, if parents believe their children are not fulfilling this responsibility they can file lawsuits against them for neglect. If they still refuse to follow through their credit standing will be negatively impacted.
Beijing enacted a similar law in 2013 aimed at getting the children of parents older than 60 to visit their parents “frequently” and make sure their financial and emotional needs are met.
China’s decision is based on filial piety (respect for one’s father, elders, and ancestors) an important aspect of Confucianism. Given that there aren’t enough people who follow Confucius in Australia to mandate such a law, we aren’t going to be able to rely on that ,so how do we get our kids to come visit when we get older?
- We could never teach them to be independent so they need us even after they’ve left home. The problem with this is they would be intolerable and even we wouldn’t want to be with them.
- We could live really close to wherever they are and just accidentally bump into them all the time. The only thing is we would turn into full time baby sitters and after the age of 60 I am not sure many of us want to go back into full time babysitting which can quickly become full time parenting.
- We could bribe them to see us. Again that may result in a lot of grandchildren babysitting because what can you really use as collateral for your bribe to make it powerful enough to be enticing?
The price per cheap viagra in india pill varies slightly depending on the pharmacy, but a consumer can expect to pay prices as low as $1 per pill when they are bought in sufficient quantity. It is meant to be consumed by the http://www.midwayfire.com/minutes/Approved%20minutes%207-9-13.doc cheap soft viagra male patient. With the intake of the magic plant Anti Allergy Pills, get free viagra it sends a signal to the human brain that the stomach is not empty and fools it. Alcohol is legal for order discount viagra midwayfire.com adults, but look at the harm abuse of this substance can cause.
I am using the age old method of do-unto-others by telling my son very loudly every time I go visit my mother hoping he will think this is standard practice and visit me as often in his adulthood.
Otherwise I can resort to the way of my own ancestry and just burden him with guilt.